Being alone, with intent, is ultimately trusting the fulfillment of God’s promise for your life. And good God, that is really hard to do.
I think it’s already been determined that we are social creatures. We physically and emotionally need connection with other life, or we wither. And sometimes we take that innate desire and we fear it.
I think it all comes down to love again; we all just want to be loved. And we worry that if we don’t secure a permanent connection to our lives, at times, we’ll be without that love. That can be scary and, well, lonely.
It takes a perspective shift to recognize that love is constantly all around us. I’m learning that instead of hoping that one person will supply all my needed love, I’m finding the love I need is coming from many people. Even people I don’t know.
Acts of kindness, support, smiles from strangers, laughs, and people who tell me they get what I’m saying. Those are all the methods of connection I need right now, being supplied somewhat randomly and in so many different ways.
Being open to that, instead of trying to squeeze love from one source constantly, frees me to be available for more opportunities of various connections (and subsequently doesn’t end up burning out that one source). It also, I’m finding, helps me build my emotional independence.
So if a future connection should ever present itself (or not!), I can maintain a healthy balance of connection. So, yes, alone time, it’s necessary in our paths sometimes. And it’s scary. But to be honest, I’m finding that if you’re open to looking at it differently, you’re not ever really alone.
You’re just trusting that you’ll be taken care of, serendipitously.